That's unrelated to the song, for the most part. But I just thought I'd provide some food for thought.
I've been walking around in this fog of extreme hurt for nearly a month, so I get that my songs are depressing lately. But so is having a bruised and beaten - and exasperated - heart. It's like my insides are black and blue.
And I'm trying to figure out if I have a right to be angry at the perpetrator.
A Million Ways
you could have said hello a time or two
or you could've asked me, "how are you?"
instead of making me wonder what about me made you turn away
and maybe you could have smiled back
you could have let me make you laugh
because all I wanted was for you to let me in more than halfway
how much time would that really have taken?
but instead, now my heart is breaking
CHORUS:
oh, all the times I happen to cross your path during the day
you could have made me happy in a million little ways
but you're the beautiful tears rolling down my cheek
and the cloud of anger that's making me weak
you see, now I'm sitting here, thinking of all the things you might have done
'cause there were a million ways to make me smile, without making me cry once
you didn't have to ask me out one time
and then change your mind the very next night
because I can take a hint that's not even a little cruel
maybe you could have realised your mistakes
the ones made from our very first handshake
and instead of me always apologising, you could have said, "I'm sorry," too
how much time would that really have taken?
but instead, now my heart is breaking
CHORUS:
oh, all the times I happen to cross your path during the day
you could have made me happy in a million little ways
but you're the beautiful tears rolling down my cheek
and the cloud of anger that's making me weak
you see, now I'm sitting here, thinking of all the things you might have done
'cause there were a million ways to make me smile, without making me cry once
BRIDGE:
it really wouldn't have taken much,
'cause there was a time I thrilled at the slightest touch
and I promise that it used to be
that just the sight of you would make me happy
but you're the beautiful tears rolling down my cheek
and the cloud of anger that's making me weak
still, here I am, thinking of all the things you might have done
'cause there were a million ways to make me smile, without making me cry once
So much of me wishes I could bring back the exquisite wordplay of the songs I was writing at this time last year. "Less in Love," "Weren't We," "Slow-Dancing on the Edge of a Flame," "The Only Thing." I miss those moments - those were stories worth living, stories worth remembering. What I'm writing about now is something not even worth living through the first time.
I guess I also miss the person I was this time last year. I wasn't perfect (never will be), but at least I didn't walk around feeling the way I do now. And I'm never going to be as good a writer as I was back then.
I'm never going to be the same.
Thank you for the musik.
You've got one foot in and one foot out the door / and, baby, I can't take it anymore.
What do you get when you fall in love? / a guy with a pin, to burst your bubble / that's what you get for all your trouble / I'll never fall in love again / I'll never fall in love again.
