Lucky Ones

This isn't the song I teased in the previous post, so if you were looking forward to that, I am sorry to disappoint you.  That one is forthcoming, I promise.  But the one in this post is already fully-formed, and so chronology dictates that I present this one first.

And tradition dictates I begin with the backstory.  But first, a little something I missed in the last post.

Taylor!  Taylor Swift has begun releasing singles from Red, one a week, just as she did with Speak Now.  And it's ever so exciting, because each one reassures me that "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" is not indicative of the rest of the album.  Yay!  The second single, "Begin Again," is absolutely stunning.  It glitters and sparkles and pulses, like the most ethereal and beautiful of waves.  The lyrics are breathtakingly wonderful: "I've been spending the last eight months, thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end, but on a Wednesday in a cafe, I watched it begin again..."  Oh, just classic Taylor stuff.  I love her.  As for the next one, "Red," the title track, I can't say that I've listened to it enough to have an opinion, really.  But I know the lyrics are so poetic.  So well-written.  But don't worry, come the week of the 22nd of October, I'll have another post up, where as with Fearless and Speak Now, I will provide a run-down of the album.  It's going to be terrific.  (I'll get to 19 posts yet.)

And now I can proceed with the backstory.

Okay, so I met this guy.  To be honest, that's pretty much where the story ends.  I met this guy.  And then we each walked away, separately.  But something happened as we were talking (and honestly, "I do have a girlfriend, but I find you very interesting and would like to get a drink with you sometime to get to be friends with you," ranks somewhere between "I am gay" and "I have that effect on a lot of people" on my list of things I don't want to hear from guys but that have been said to me anyway), and I came away with all of these wonderful daydreams - because that's all I'll ever have, I've resigned myself to that fact - of how my life would be if my absolute number 1 life's dream came true for me.  My number 1 life's dream is, by the way, to be a mother.  So I fell asleep amidst these daydreams, and slept thinking about it.  By the next morning, the first parts of this song were already forming.  All I had to do was to set them down on paper.

I have this absolutely breathtakingly-paralysing fear that my dream isn't going to happen, at all or the way it should.  But if and/or when it does, I desperately want my children to know how much I love them already, how much they were wanted, how much I was looking forward to having them.  This is one way of letting them know that.  So of course, the song is make-believe.  But it's a beautiful make-believe I can't wait to experience for real.  Even if it's not this way in real life.

Lucky Ones

baby, this is my first memory of you,
I'm smiling down at that little plus sign
trembling, and laughing, and crying, too
and this room feels motionless in time
the cat comes in, you'll meet her soon enough
and you'll tug her tail like I've been afraid to do
your daddy says, "we're more than two of us"
he's holding me, so he's holding you
and it's like I'm seeing him for the first time,
because suddenly, he's more than just mine

CHORUS:
oh, baby, we are the lucky ones
and, baby, we are yours, from now on
you were loved before you even came to be
and you were wanted, desperately
so please know, you made us the lucky ones

today is the first whole day of fall
and already the leaves are changing
I'm looking with child's eyes at it all
and I see magic in everything
for no reason, the power went out last night
but there are no monsters in the dark
we ate cookies by the candlelight
and I swear I could almost feel your heart
everything old is new again
you were a part of everything we said

CHORUS:
oh, baby, we are the lucky ones
and, baby, we are yours, from now on
you were loved before you even came to be
and you were wanted, desperately
so please know, you made us the lucky ones

BRIDGE:
you should see us, talking about our lives this time next year
how many nights have I stayed up, thinking about these moments?
so, baby, won't you hurry up and get here?

you are the first dream I ever had,
but I never dreamed it alone
this man, who you will call your dad
and this house, that you have made a home...

So it's a little detail-oriented and -specific.  I was kind of writing it as though it were happening the day I was writing it.  So that's where the image of the power outage comes in, and the fall, and stuff.  You're probably going to judge me very much for this song, but it has made me happy.  And I don't want to hide.  Which is an ironic thing to say, given the anonymous nature of this blog.

Anyway, much love, and thank you for the musik,

Just Another Ordinary Girl

She ain't even thinking 'bout what's really going on right now, but I guarantee this memory's a big 'un.  And she thinks we're just fishing.