Loved You Best

As promised, this is the pseudo-follow-up to the previous song, to "Charming."  They both work as stand-alone songs, but I think they're imbued with a little bit more meaning when put together in such close proximity and chronology.  They're bookends, if you will.  "Charming" was kind of the beginning of a story, and "Loved You Best" is the end of it.  Well, basically, all of the songs posted this year have been the end, but there is a direct link, obviously, between those two specifically.  The whole charming thing.  Which you'll see.

And once you read it, hopefully, you'll see why "Loved You Best" is the continuation of the evening described in "Charming."  As I said, the charming part of somebody is the way you get drawn into wanting to know him or her better, but the "when you weren't being charming, is when I loved you best" (from the chorus of the song below) is all the moments afterwards, when the walls of trying to impress somebody come down and you don't have to try to be cute or appealing and can just be completely yourself because you know he won't mind and that's the best part.  So this is a song that speaks to that, the moments beyond the charisma and the construction of the charm, the moments when it was isolated from anyone who was on the outside looking in, the moments when it was okay to be crazy and fearless and stupid and joyful and funny (I love the line "we were funny before we got too stressed"), because it was just two people.  No one was judging, no one else was there when the walls came down, who wouldn't understand the relationship.  So, yeah.

I might be repeating myself here, from the previous post.

So I'll move on and try to explain where this song came from, as itself.  And the truth is that I have no idea how I came up with this song so quickly; I was writing one song during class one April Wednesday earlier this year, and then this one came out of nowhere.  I'd been mulling around the final line in the chorus (the "charming" one) for a long time, and I had the first two lines waiting for me on my iPhone notes application, also for a while, but I originally meant them in a different context.  It's kind of strange how that happens, that something which seemed right in one circumstance suddenly makes more sense in quite another.  But it was astonishing, how this song came out of that.  Suddenly, I'd found my "Holy Ground," referencing the song from Taylor Swift's Red.  And what was even more amazing was that I still have so many phrases and memories and lines that I wanted to put into a song, but it was too much to fit just into this one.  I've been writing so many sad and lonely songs lately (more coming) that it felt kind of wonderful to write this one, focusing on happier things, more positive things.  There's always something good that can come out of the bad, I think.  I always try to look for a silver lining, no matter how difficult it can be.

So, yeah.  I really like this song.  It's lighthearted, and it tries (I say "tries," because I don't want to be too assertive or self-congratulatory in saying that it flat-out does) to capture that joy and exuberance and ease and youth.  For instance, I can't get over that phrase, "it was wonderful and crazy" - I don't know why.  But at the same time, the undercurrent is that you (the reader, you) know it doesn't last, so the fleetingness of the moments being described comes across with a certain bittersweetness that is beautiful in its own delicate way.

Enjoy.

Loved You Best

do you remember, I was sixteen and you were everything I wanted to know
together, we were stardust and a firecracker, and we weren't exactly taking it slow
we used to drive to a place we picked on the map, and we wouldn't tell a soul
and I loved to be in the car with you, your arm hanging out the window
we'd turn on the radio, and make up new words to every song we knew
our cocoon of steel shut out the world 'til it was just me and you

CHORUS:
and that's how I remember it, the time I passed with you
it was wonderful and crazy, and went by just a little too fast
looking back now and then it still leaves me kind of breathless
that we were funny before we got too stressed
you were mine before you were anyone else's
and when you weren't being charming, is when I loved you best

it's been a while, but still the sound I remember most is both of us laughing
together, we were sunrise and a hurricane, and we made silly faces in photographs
we used to stay up late for no reason but that we didn't want to sleep
and I loved feeling like we were the only two awake in the whole city
we'd close the door and be far away from people who could ridicule
and we wore out the bedroom floorboards dancing around like a pair of fools

CHORUS:
and that's how I remember it, the time I passed with you
it was wonderful and crazy, and went by just a little too fast
looking back now and then it still leaves me kind of breathless
that we were funny before we got too stressed
you were mine before you were anyone else's
and when you weren't being charming, is when I loved you best

and I loved that all the girls that were dying to know you never had a prayer
and in all the time I don't think there was a single second I was scared

CHORUS:
and that's how I remember it, the time I passed with you
it was wonderful and crazy, and went by just a little too fast
looking back now and then, it still leaves me kind of breathless
that we were funny before we got too stressed
you were mine before you were anyone else's
and when you weren't being charming, is when I loved you best

(outro:)
I loved you in starlight, I loved you in bare feet
I loved you in sunglasses, and I loved you with me
I loved you in black and white, I loved you in red
I loved you in army green, and I loved you best
I loved you in starlight, I loved you in bare feet
I loved you in sunglasses, and I loved you with me
I loved you in black and white, I loved you in red
when you weren't charming, is when I loved you best

Oh, man.  "You were mine before you were anyone else's" just struck me as so beautiful.

I also think there's something nice about saying "I loved you best" instead of "I loved you most."  I don't quite know what it is about that phrasing, but it somehow means more.  I don't know.

But maybe you do.

Much love, and thank you for the musik,

Just Another Ordinary Girl

You carried romance in the palm of your hand, you called the plays for us...and it drove me, and it drove me, and it drove me wild.